We don’t always agree with the choices our friends make. Maybe we don’t like the choices for selfish reasons, or maybe it’s for reasons that our friends just don’t see.
I’m sure we’ve all had negative feelings towards our friend’s boyfriends at one point or another. Maybe it’s because we think they are too good for that particular person, or maybe it’s because he isn’t good to her. Either way, these situations require care to avoid damaging your relationship with your BFF.
A Time to Keep Quiet
Unfortunately, there are times you just need to keep it to yourself. Think about the reason for your animosity. If it is jealousy, then you want to keep it inside. Instead of trying to explain yourself, you may end up jeopardizing your friendship. In the end, is jealousy worth it?
A Time to Speak Up–Carefully
There are times when an outsider (you in this case) sees the person for who he really is, and your friend may be too blind to his charms to see what everyone else does. In this situation, you still need to be extra careful with the way you approach your friend. You never want to attack her boyfriend because that will immediately put them both on the defensive. Instead, there are some tactics that may be more beneficial and allow your friend to see him as if she was the outsider looking in.
You can use an example of someone your friend knows, either how another friend was treated or the example of a guy you both know and the nature of his being. Maybe she has heard of someone else being treated in a disrespectful manner, and you can use that as an example and explain how that is the same way other people see their relationship.
A Time to Step Up
Sometimes it is just plainly your issue, and you need to really step up to the plate. Make a point to hang out with your BFF’s boyfriend one on one to get to know–and hopefully–like him. But never talk behind their backs. Just remember, she was your friend before she dated him, and you want to make sure you are still friends if they break up. Whatever you do, make sure you are not the one to break them up in the end.
One more piece of advice is to always make sure you still get your one-on-one time with your friend. Always let her know you are there for her in any situation. That is what a best friend does!
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